The First Peaceful night of Sleep
After they cleaned the mess in the room, they enjoyed the sticky rice balls and sweet soup, took a shower, and finally lied on the bed. By that time, it was already past midnight.
Gu Hai was unable to control the apprehension that ruptured in his mind and let his voice sounded in the silent room.
“Another year is gone, time really flew by quickly.”
Bai Luo Yin slept beside him, his two elongated arms wrapped securely onto the pillow as he rested his chin comfortably atop it. Those earthen eyes slightly narrowed in amusement, seemingly enjoying the tranquility that quietness brought.
With only the two of them in the room, their eyes only held each other, their ears only heard the sound of the person’s voice. Everything else happening outside had nothing to do with them or the space that kept them safe and together. Right here… right now.
Gu Hai placed his hand on Bai Luo Yin’s neck, feeling the vein beneath his palm throbbing vigorously—a nameless serenity streamed into his heart and fortified itself there.
Just like a drug addict who had strenuously endured the pain of withdrawal for countless days and was finally being able to have that addiction surge inside his veins, this was pure bliss. The effect of the drug quickly dispersed throughout his body, leaving even the crevices under his bones elated.
Bai Luo Yin narrowed his eyes and glanced at Gu Hai up and down.
He was still the same person, albeit a little thinner, had some seriously stubborn stubbly encircling his chin, and the contour of his face was more distinctive than usual.
“You should shave.”
Gu Hai crude and unrefined fingers touched the lower half of his own face; only then did he realized that those prickling stubbles were there and that he not shaved for a long while. In truth, he had even forgotten the date, and the last time he had washed his face.
“Having a little bit of beard gives off a manly demeanor,” Gu Hai said lazily, consoling himself with this shameless excuse.
Bai Luo Yin snorted and unable to hold back, he laughed out loud.
“Perhaps it would make others look a bit more handsome but for you… forget about it. You just look old.”
An air of displeasure swept across Gu Hai’s eyes, “Why do you always say I look old? Where have I grown old?”
Gu Hai gritted his teeth and pondered in agony of a particular flaw that Bai Luo Yin’s body possessed so that he could make a counterattack. But, in the end, he discovered that every inch of him was visually attractive—eye candy for him every time he caught sight of it. Thus, there was absolutely no flaw… not even one that he could pinpoint.
Bai Luo Yin got off the bed and walked to the bathroom before returning in less than a minute with a towel hanging loosely on his arm.
“Go lie over there,” Bai Luo Yin commanded and pointed over to the two people sofa near the front door.
Gu Hai slowly straightened his body, “For what?”
Bai Luo Yin mischievously swayed the shaver in his hand…left and right, making it quite clear what his intentions were.
A flicker of light sped pass Gu Hai’s eyes as if he had reached some sort of epiphany that had caused a smile to appear while his cheeks rose.
Before, it was Gu Hai who washed Bai Luo Yin’s foot and shaved his beard. How was it that now Gu Hai, himself, was able to enjoy this kind of treatment!
The fact that Bai Luo Yin had willingly returned to his side was more than enough to make Gu Hai face the heaven, drop to his knees and bow five hundred times against the cold hard ground. If Bai Luo Yin was even a bit good to him, he would jump for joy. But to be able to taste such bliss was more than his heart could ask for—not to mention any other divine euphoria.
When Bai Luo Yin caught sight of Young Master Gu’s mouth stretching out from ear to ear, he immediately knew that this despicable guy was probably indulging in his own fantasy. At first, he just wanted to use the towel to moisten Gu Hai’s face to prevent his wild fantasy from becoming even more insatiable. But now, perhaps, it would be better if he let him wipe his own face.
With that in mind, Bai Luo Yin flung the towel on Gu Hai’s face and went to the bathroom to grab the shaving cream. He flipped over the shaving cream and squeezed some onto his hand before spreading it evenly on the lower half of Gu Hai’s face and waited until the beard softened.
Gu Hai leaned back against the sofa and opened his eyes. They seemed to scintillate fire—beautiful and soft as he looked closely at the person hovering over him. Bai Luo Yin clouded his vision, giving him another chance to imprint everything that made up this person into his brain.
At first, the distance between them seemed pretty far, but as Bai Luo Yin held the shaver with steadied hand and began to move it against the surface of his face, his own face inched closer and closer. So much so that Gu Hai could feel the heat permeating from Bai Luo Yin’s mouth before it floated against the surface of his own shaven chin. Bai Luo Yin maintained a stern and focus demeanor as he went on with his task, appearing to somewhat ignore the intense gaze of the person below him.
Apparently, it was the first time he had shaved someone else beard and that made him want to be extra careful.
Gu Hai’s hand reached out to Bai Luo Yin’s cheeks, inch by inch.
Bai Luo Yin swiftly avoided those hands, “Don’t move around.”
With that command, Gu Hai’s hand lingered stiffly in the air.
When Bai Luo Yin stopped, Gu Hai suddenly hook the back of his head and pressed his cheek against his own. The faint musky smell of the cream mingled with their breaths as they drew closer. Bai Luo Yin felt intoxicated and his consciousness became somewhat blurry as if beckoning him to give in. But since his body was bent over in such an awkward position, he felt extremely uncomfortable and ended up struggling free of Gu Hai’s strong grip.
“You have to wipe it clean, otherwise it will be uncomfortable,” said Bai Luo Yin.
Gu Hai’s eyes were raging with red flames when he spoke in a low husky tone. “There’s no need for that. I can’t wait any longer.”
Gu Hai suddenly exerted all his energy, hook his arm around Bai Luo Yin’s waist and pulled him toward his own body. He then intentionally knocked his feet against Bai Luo Yin’s feet which made Bai Luo Yin who was caught off guard lose his balance, stumbled and fell forward. Gu Hai allowed Bai Luo Yin’s body to crash heavily on top of his own. He did not give Bai Luo Yin a chance to respond or retaliate as he held his face and… kissed him.
Once their lips touched, sparks erupted, and an electrifyingly beautiful dance ensued within the boundary of that connection—their breaths became ridden with eagerness as they delved deeper and deeper into the others’ impatient kiss.
At first, it was Gu Hai who had his lips securely on Bai Luo Yin’s—tasting, teasing and nibbling with the unwillingness to release them from within his own hungry mouth. But afterward, Bai Luo Yin’s tongue snaked out and seized Gu Hai’s, pulling it into his ardently awaiting cavity. Gu Hai’s heart stopped; the mere contact of their tongues sent shivers through his nerves that made his whole body tremble in ecstasy.
Like two famished kids that had not consumed anything for several days, the moment they saw their mother’s breast, they would gnaw at it as if their life depended on it.
That was the taste of remembering, missing and… longing to see what was precious had reached its pinnacle.
Deepening the kiss, they reveled in each other taste and let their tongues wrestled. The need to know and explore was an assurance… an assurance that they existed in this time and space together.
For the longest time, their hands searched for each other in agony and it was only when they firmly grasped each other, did their search ended.
Separation is a painful and… excruciatingly torturous yet trivial matter. But never having felt separation, you will never experience the deep feeling of love that you have for someone.
As it turns out, I miss you… I long to see you.
In every lonely night, under every cold blanket—I realized how much… I needed you.
Bai Luo Yin gradually brought his own actions to a halt before he slowly yet somewhat reluctantly, shifted his face away. He then nestled his own disoriented head into the crevice of Gu Hai’s anticipating shoulder as his lungs cried out in need of air in. Inhale and exhale, inhale and… when he opened his eyes once more, Gu Hai’s bouncing Adam’s apple was right before him.
Gu Hai tilted his head to the side, feigning anger as he peered down at Bai Luo Yin who was somewhat frowning. The tone of his voice was infused with the complaint of a person who was about to face death.
“You’ve almost tortured me to death for this entire month!”
Hearing that made Bai Luo Yin understand what the idiom, ‘the villain sues his victim before he himself is prosecuted’ meant.
His soft face, which was normally a seldom sight to come by, immediately tightened in dismay as frustration appeared along the lines of his statuesque countenance.
“You fucking have the nerve to say that it was me? Who is to fucking blame for this?”
Gu Hai thought about it… the cause of the past that affected the event of today and possibly the future. But even then, he could not find anything that would put him at an advantage.
Ultimately, he had no choice but to admit: “Blame me.”
Bai Luo Yin coldly grunted, humph, before his hand curled into a fist and smashed into the pit of Gu Hai’s stomach.
Gu Hai seized that opportunity to grab Bai Luo Yin’s hands, pulled it close to his lips and kissed it. However, his heart was still a bit unstable in his tightened chest.
“Even if I’m to blame, you also should not have been so cruel and heartless, right? You adamantly said you wouldn’t see me anymore and you really didn’t… and you said you will walk on the streets with other people, and you really did. We have been apart for such a long time, wasn’t it a bit unbearable or even a bit painful for you as well?”
Bai Luo Yin pulled his hand back and sat upright, “Even if I am in pain or can’t bear it, I still won’t let you see it!”
Gu Hai sat up and hugged Bai Luo Yin from behind with great care, letting his chest rested against it as his chin snuggled into his shoulder.
With great interest, he asked: “In what ways did you suffer? Tell me about it.”
“What is there to say?” Bai Luo Yin became annoyed and somewhat angry.
Gu Hai’s seductive lips caressed Bai Luo Yin’s nap. “I want to hear it.”
His sultry voice and the heat that secreted that flowed out made the hair on Bai Luo Yin’s neck stand on end.
“You know, you’re an especially despicable person. You always take pleasure in other people’s pain and suffering,” Bai Luo Yin recalled Gu Hai’s previous statement. “You said that I’m cruel and heartless, am I more heartless than you? You got two soldiers to beat me up. Tell me, how much have I suffered? If it happened to you, how would you feel?”
Because of a misunderstanding, the person who usually showed the most consideration and took the best care of you actually struck you when he said he would… every single time Bai Luo Yin thought of this matter, a fit of rage would consume him.
Gu Hai straightened up while his gazed met Bai Luo Yin’s—a sense of urgency ravished the expression in his eyes.
“I have to explain that. You’re right, I did order those two young soldiers, but I did not instruct them to attack you. They misinterpreted my intentions and thought that the person I like was Shi Hui. So when they saw the two of you being intimate, they just…”
Bai Luo Yin felt as if two persimmons had smashed his skull, making him feel someone disgusted. What do you call this? It was just like being arrested for no reason while strolling the streets, then dragged to the police station and locked up. Before you know it, you’re being beaten up for an entire day and night only to be told early the next morning that they caught the wrong person…
Bai Luo Yin’s face darkened as he got off the sofa and walked back to his own bed.
Gu Hai’s heart also became tormented, “I know that I’m an asshole because of that. Every time I think about it, I also feel guilty, but at that time, I gritted my teeth and refrained myself from going to see you for the sake of venting my own selfish anger. I’m going to the military base tomorrow. There are still some things that I have to bring back. Come with me, I will get those two soldiers and you can punish them however you like. What do you think?”
Bai Luo Yin shot Gu Hai a glance, “You’re the person that should be punished the most!”
Gu Hai sprawled on the bed, letting his limbs splay in all directions as his eyes obsessed over Bai Luo Yin’s prepossessing appearance. “Come, you can punish me however you want.”
Bai Luo Yin ignored him and squeezed himself into the blanket.
Gu Hai used his leg to nudge Bai Luo Yin, “I gave you such a good opportunity, yet you choose to not cherish it.”
Bai Luo Yin’s indolent voice came from inside the blanket. “Forget about it. Just let the past remain in the past. I was also wrong, so we don’t have to blame each other. Let’s see what your actions are like from now on.”
Gu Hai also squeezed himself into the blanket and placed his hand on Bai Luo Yin’s shoulder.
Bai Luo Yin’s loud voice sounded loudly in the room when he gave a warning: “Sleep.”
“I wasn’t thinking of doing anything else!”
While Gu Hai said this, he grabbed Bai Luo Yin’s body and turned him over so that the two faced each other. Then his hands wrapped around Bai Luo Yin’s waist, hugging him affectionately before he closed his eyes—perfectly contented.
It had been longer than a month… this was the first peaceful night of sleep for both of them.